Once a cheater, always a cheater? Honey, were BORN a cheater. If there was a way to cheat after death, you’d do that, too. You cheat like you eat. You cheat like you breathe. You cheat like you sleep. You like the cheating, you like the getting-caught part, and then you like cheating on the person you cheated on your previous lover with. Let’s face it—you’re a cheater.
Everyone knows you’re a cheater, but do you really have to be so open about it? I mean, you didn’t even put away the lube and used condoms that you left on your night table. But you don’t even mind getting caught, because it’s an ego boost—you actually prefergetting caught, you egomaniac szekszaholic. Your “number” is very high—higher than even your credit score. You have a “bullpen” full of backup lovers that you can booty-call at 4AM should things go south with the current one. Woe unto the poor soul who falls in love with you, because sooner or later they’re going to fall on their face.
It’s not even that you like szeksz so much as you love feeling wanted, so it’s a near certainty that you will eventually resort to emotional cheating. Relationships and love are important to you—not so important, of course, that you don’t have a few pieces on the side at all times. You share details of the current guy with this other guy…and that other guy. One’s a former lover. One’s a potential future lover. And you’re so talented at cheating once you set your mind on it, you can have dinner with all three guys at the same restaurant at the same time, and none of them will suspect.
Your partner might not be doing anything wrong at all. It’s just that you get curious. And then your mind wanders. You don’t like feeling trapped. Your inner ram just wants to go out and “lock horns” every so often, if you catch my drift. You like sampling different lovers as if they were different pastries at a fine French bakery. The worst thing about you is that you won’t try to hide it once you’re caught—in fact, you’ll rub it in his face. After all, if he was satisfying you and knew how to keep you happy, you wouldn’t have cheated in the first place…right?